Day 24–3 Keys to Mentorship
My life and career goals have completely changed since I turned 50. In my younger years, I was focused on pushing, striving, and achieving in order to prove something to myself and to those who doubted me. Although I have accomplished far more than I ever thought possible, my drive remains strong.
However, my motivation has shifted. Instead of seeking success and achievement, my new goal is to become the best mentor I can be. Like an aging NBA player, I recognize that I can’t keep up with the younger players on the court anymore. But that doesn’t mean I have nothing to offer the game; perhaps I can become a great coach.
Just 24 days ago, I stepped down from 27 years of pastoral ministry. In this next season of life, I want to mentor pastors and church leaders, especially emerging leaders.
So, what is a mentor, really? The U.S. National Academy of Sciences defines mentorship as:
“a professional working alliance in which individuals work together over time to support personal and professional growth, development, and success.”
This definition highlights three key aspects of mentorship:
3 Keys of Mentorship
1. Mentorship is an ALLIANCE.
The relationship between a mentor and a mentee should not be demanding or controlling. It doesn’t require the mentee to lose their identity or abandon their own goals. An alliance is formed when both parties agree to work together toward a common goal. The primary objective in the mentorship alliance is to foster the mentee’s growth and development, and both parties must be committed to this goal for effective mentorship to occur.
2. Mentorship assumes GROWTH.
Growth is the central purpose of the mentoring relationship. Both the mentor and the mentee must believe in the possibility of growth and be willing to work toward that goal. A mentor cannot be a pushy dictator who forces their mentee to grow if the mentee is not willing.
3. Mentorship is a SUPPORTIVE role.
While a mentor cannot cause the mentee to grow, they can assist in the mentee’s growth process by providing necessary support. This support can include knowledge, insight, encouragement, coaching, and modeling. The mentor’s role is only to offer this support; ultimately, they prepare the mentee for the big challenges ahead. Once the moment arrives, the mentor can only watch and cheer.
I am looking forward to this next chapter of my career. I genuinely believe I will be a far better coach than I was as a player. In fact, some of the best coaches were never the top players on their teams. Phil Jackson, Steve Kerr, Pat Riley, Gregg Popovich, and Erik Spoelstra are considered some of the NBA’s greatest coaches, yet none of them were the standout players on their teams.
That’s why I am hopeful about my transition to the bench.
Always onwards,
Thien
